Remembering Jay: A Powerful Lesson in How to Live

Every person who walks into our school becomes an extended member of our family. When our children were younger, they knew every student as uncle or aunt and grew up with a village watching over them, showering them with love and gifting them wisdom. Over the last three decades, we have lost students to many things in life. Some have changed hobbies and interests, while others have fallen ill. Every loss affects us differently, with the ones we had the most interaction with often being the most painful. 

Recently, while we were camping with a few friends and students, we received information that one of our former students, Jay Smith, had passed away. Jay was a bit younger than me, with two beautiful daughters who were near our daughters' ages. I remember this exact day like it was yesterday. Jay asked for a one-on-one sit-down and said he had received some troubling news. Jay, who was an active and in-shape husband and father, was diagnosed with ALS. If you don’t know, ALS is a progressive neurodegenerative disease that attacks nerve cells in the brain and spinal cord. It destroys motor neurons, nerve cells that control voluntary muscles (such as those used for walking, talking, and chewing). This leads to atrophy, a loss of muscle control and paralysis, eventually affecting our ability to breathe, making it ultimately fatal. ALS remains a mystery to this day, and everyone’s journey with it is unique. It’s a horrible deterioration of the body that often leaves a person’s mind strong, while the body slowly shuts down. It has no specific type of person that it threatens. In fact, it often manifests in active, in-shape individuals, changing their entire lives.

Personally, I can’t imagine receiving this diagnosis, and I’m not sure how I would even respond to the news that I had it. What would I do and how would I act? On that day, speaking with Jay, there were lots of questions and not many answers, but he was a stoic rock, unshaken, his creative mind already searching for how he would beat it. We sat down immediately and created a program that allowed him to train safely and enjoy his newfound love of martial arts. Over the next year, he dove deep with a drive not only to make himself better but also to raise awareness of ALS with his organization, Every 90 Minutes, alerting the world that every 90 minutes someone is diagnosed and someone dies from ALS. He helped launch and popularize the viral Ice Bucket Challenge and went on to try experimental therapies for himself, all the while giving hope to others in similar situations. 

His training with us stopped once ALS started to take over his bdy, but he remained sharp, full of hope, and a beacon for others dealing with ALS. As the years progressed, we followed his journey through comical updates he would share on social media of how he was doing. Honestly, life never seemed to stop for Jay. No matter how bad the situation was, he always had a way of putting a shiny, positive spin on it. 

I am sure that anyone who met Jay or spent any length of time with him feels the way we do. His passing hit us hard and at first left a major hole in our hearts, but upon reflection, he left us so much. Jay’s outlook on an extremely tough, challenging, and life-altering situation is exactly what we should adopt. News doesn’t always come sweet, and life can be difficultly bitter. We have two ways to roll with it. We can give up, or we can climb higher and further, showing everyone how to actually live. Jay did just that leading the charge for all of us. Nothing kept him down, and he always found a way to live life to its fullest. None of us know exactly how many days we have; all we can do is choose how to live them. Thank you, Jay, for reminding us that no matter how bad things seem, you can find a way to be the best version of yourself and show everyone what is possible. We love you brother!

#ComingForYou2026
#YearOfTheHORSE
#FightTheGoodFight

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Guro Larry, Sonja, Lauren & Tori St. Clair
Martial Way Legacy
"A Compass to the Preservation of Bruce Lee’s Philosophy and Legacy"
http://www.martialwaylegacy.com
512-821-3637